the kind of disappointment you feel
when you realise that a good friend
might not regard you as a good friend anymore
is inexplicable and makes your heart heavy

it doesnt matter if the person din mean much
it is when you know that the person means a lot
and yet, you have no idea how things came to be like this
not enough effort, not enough time?

sometimes, i wonder if it's easier
for the person to just say
i dun wan to meet you
maybe that will make things clearer?

though i am sure it will be very hurtful
which is the lesser of two evils
trying to arrange an impossible meeting
or being told in your face

when i thot all that mattered, was the connection..
or perhaps i have been living
in my own illusionary world
that i painted myself

let's hope i m just being overly sensitive, as usual..